How the culture trains you to be a non-achiever…

It seems like I have hit a nerve: yesterday’s article was read by more people than any of my other articles in a long time…

If you are not achieving, if you are not accomplishing much in life: you are not alone.

And it’s not your fault. But even though it is not your fault, if you wanted to change it… you could. with the right guidance and the right actions.

You see the culture of humans has devolved, so that now who has the biggest voice is dictating it.

Culture is the characteristic features of everyday existence (such as diversions or a way of life) shared by people in a place or time
The set of shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices of a species.

And who they are: they are the politicians, the marketers, and the faith-spirituality shysters.

All of them are interested in a humanity out of balance. A humanity focusing on having. A humanity that buys whatever b.s. they sell.

Now, the question is: can you, with help, lift yourself above that out of balance creating narrative… or not?

The answer is: maybe not.

Why am I so ‘negative’?

The percentage of people who completely free themselves from the allure of the temporary and focus on the eternal is practically zero.

But the number of people who actually accomplish and achieve what they want to achieve is not zero… and although the path to that ‘having’ achievement, money, fame, fortune leads through the eternal, and not the other way around as many hope, that number is not zero.

About 1% of people actually can and do achieve having what they wanted.

So where does that leave you?

You see, because the talkers, the politicians, the marketers and the faith-shysters cater to those who won’t achieve, but want to have what they want without the effort it takes… you need to learn what it takes to succeed… and learn a different ‘narrative’… a narrative from reality, not from lies.

Judging from some conversations with some of my clients and students, this is the hardest part…

Hearing it, parroting it is not that hard… but acting on the narrative from reality is wicked hard if you are sold on the superman leaping tall buildings, or deserving, or the universe providing hogwash.

Or the vibrational match with what you want…


But it is seductive.

I admit that for many years I took all the classes, read all the books, watched all the videos that taught that lying fantasy… I was especially interested in being able to change my mood, my internal negativity, my misery.

So I know where you are. I know what it’s like. I know you think it should work, but it won’t.

What got me out of that state, out of being a seeker for a fix, was surprisingly a series of courses I did where I was asked to DO something…

There was a 90 minute webinar, and an assignment. I did all the assignments right after the webinar, I didn’t leave them to next day. I had the webinar page open, so I could look up the things that turned out I didn’t quite understand… and I turned in the assignments in about an hour each week.

I did this in every course I took with this guy for about seven or eight years… at the tune of a few grands…

Time management, coding, webinars, course creation, video sales letters, self-management, project managements. I learned it this way from the same guy.

I didn’t learn about it, like you do, like you think is enough…

You hear it, you see it, you see it demonstrated, and no learning is happening. Until you actually do it, and do it accurately, you didn’t learn it.

In yesterday’s email I asked: Why none of the stuff you buy work for you…

The answer is, of course, your mindset that doesn’t allow you to actually do what you were taught to do.

And if you, right now, want to argue with me telling me you did it… No, you did not. Why? Because you expect the results to be instant, you expect everything instant… the leaping tall buildings way.

You look at every brick, every assignment as the saving grace, whatever that means, a means to the end… and nothing really is a means to the end.

Everything is more like a building that looks nothing like the end result while it is happening.

Just observe a building site… not those accelerated videos of dudes building a deck, or building a partition… no, a real building that starts with clearing the site, digging for the foundation, building the foundation, then building some walls… weeks, months, and it doesn’t look anything that you would want.

None of the assignments in the seven or eight year journey with that dude gave me a piece that immediately looked like what I wanted. What I wanted is to teach what I teach now to people who wanted to learn it.

I had nothing to start.

I didn’t start teaching full time until I learned to do all the things I learned to do with the dude.

I did teach part time, but the money wasn’t even covering my rent, let alone living. So I had another gig… I gave massages.

Those massage people weren’t prospects for what I teach… they just wanted a dumb female to rub them… not talk to them, or want teach them to be…

So in those massage sessions I learned human interaction skills, listening, empathy, being present, fully present. Returning my attention to the present moment. Being interested in them. Being entertaining. Etc.

Eight years. Tiny steps by tiny steps. Tiny corrections… trim-tabbing.

I built myself, I built my skills, I built what is needed to have a business where I can work only a few hours a day, and make a living.

The same skills that served me in the massage business serve me today.

And looking back, I used some of the skills I learned in those courses there too: advertising, selling, etc.

And I only stopped giving massages when I got to my 70th birthday. I just hated the idea of being an old biddy still giving massages.

I think there is another aspect that is not ‘building’ building: incubation. Allowing a skill or a desire to mature… like a human fetus… so it can survive in the real world.


I just saw an article where they put avid Fox News viewers on a CNN diet.

But just like the body that is already damaged by decades of vegetable oil use won’t recover if you turn it on an animal fat diet… your brain, your mind, your worldview is, I think, permanently damaged by whatever you feed to it.

Certain kinds of diet-induced damages can be corrected. I had a seriously leaky gut some years ago.

I stopped eating grains. Muscle test and my experience shows I can now eat grains… But then all the store bought breads have some chemical in them that are added in the factory that gives me wicked headache.

I muscletested and the small Artisan bread shops, or if I baked my own bread stuff don’t have that chemical. Muscle test says that ANYTHING they add to the bread to make its shelf-life longer is TOXIC…

And that toxin won’t clear with time.

So your ‘dance floor’ where you are free to dance gets smaller with every toxic substance, whether it is verbal or chemical.

Does that make it more difficult to accomplish? You betcha’! It does.

Does it make it impossible? No. Just a whole lot more challenging both for you and the guide, teacher, or whatever you want to call me… Your fairy godmother? lol.

Now what? What should you do if the subject line of my email hit you hard?

You’ve been buying stuff and no results.

Well, the first thing to get is: buying, even reading, watching (if it’s a video), remembering, talking about it won’t do anything for you.

Only doing. And doing with awareness.

If you were learning to create craft products from clay, and your finished cup is lopsided… Or any other creation project came out wrong… You would be tempted to throw in the towel and say: I can’t do it…

But if you can’t, won’t make room for mistakes, failures, then you cannot have success.

When I muscletest any course, I never find more people who actually learn to do the doing, more than 1%.

They may learn to do it badly… Anything that you do badly takes tiny steps to correct so you get to, step by step, to good.

And that is the second (or was it the third) issue: you abhor step by step.

But you cannot get anywhere without step by step… there is no vehicle in the domain of reality that will do that.

YOU have to do the walking.

I’d love to do a course or a workshop or a program to help you get through the barriers.

What are the requirements?

1. You need to have at least one strength, and if you don’t have one, develop one. I can help with matching it with your inner inclination and abilities… meaning: I’ll muscletest it for you.
2. You need to have a viable, doable ‘goal’ or vision, one that matches some of your strengths.
3. You need to be willing to buckle down for the long haul

My model for this possible program is The Self-Expression/Leadership program by Landmark.

I coached that program about 10 times…

The setup is simple: you create a project with the help of a coach. You create milestones, and then single actions. Also with a coach. Then you report to the coach, preferably daily… or every time you actually take a tiny step.

Once a week we gather in a ‘huddle’ where issues can be shared and where some distinctions can be taught that seem to be missing for the participants.

Landmark did this program all with volunteers, so it was relatively inexpensive. In the US it is $250. Unfortunately I cannot afford to be a ‘volunteer’, because I have to make a living… you know, like rent, food, internet…

But I am willing to do it for $40 a week plus $40 each time you actually need a ‘voice’ conversation (my regular rate for this would be $100 per short call, but because this is an experiment, I am willing to do it for less). The price includes a private area where you can converse with me, and document all your work, make your promises, evaluate your results… as often as you wish.

If you are interested, then please let me know… email me.

The program, if there is enough interest, will start some time in the middle of the month.

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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