Sweep The Floor, Wash The Windows, Vs. Move To A New House Or A New Country... Or The Different Modalities Of Self-Improvement, Self-Development And Transformation
I have been looking at some of my personal sticking points.
Addicted to milk, addicted to sugar, avoiding doing the laundry... these are just the tip of the ice berg.
Oh, you thought that I was beyond that? Oh, sorry to disappoint, you are never beyond that. Besides, if I were, I would not be writing these posts, it would be painfully boring.
Life is about growing, life is about being an advancing personality, not about comfortably teaching something that is a non-issue for me. Even if writing about it would potentially cause your growth: life is about each person becoming an advancing personality, not some teaching others to be that, so they can be off the hook...
Anyway, returning to my top of the iceberg imperfections: I am wondering what is the payoff.
You see, no one perpetuates a behavior that comes with a payoff that is smaller than the discomfort or cost. Catching a payoff without outside help is virtually impossible: it is like asking you to step over your shadow: by the time you step, it has moved ahead of you.
Why is it so difficult to see? Because it is like the water for the fish. It has shaped you and your life to the same degree that water has shaped the fish: its physiology, its psychology, everything.
So you either learn to jump out of the water long enough to notice it, or you need someone else to point it out to you.
The real payoff, the real water that shapes your life, doesn't want to be recognized.
When a coach points it out, it's a little dysphoric... that was it? But then in minutes it disappears. If it doesn't, it wasn't the real payoff. It takes seeing it a lot of times, before you can keep seeing it, over time.
Why? Because giving up a payoff requires a major life change, a major transformation, and it is never the right time to do that.
People quit their spiritual practice, their coach, their 12-step program... but the few that can face the tiger will rise to the top.
So what do coaches and self-improvement courses do instead? They help you to polish the apples, wash the windows of your life, sweep the floor, vacuum the carpet.
Do these activities make a difference? I swept the floor today, and yes, it made a difference. It brightened my apartment.
Did it cause transformation? No. But it wasn't designed to cause transformation! Did it raise my vibration? No. But it wasn't designed to raise my vibration. It brightened my day.
So why, so called transformational coaches and raise your vibration gurus tell you that they are doing transformation, or they raise your vibration? Because you buy that.
You are happy about your clean windows, you are happy about your shiny apples. And you like that you can pride yourself as a transformed being. That in conversations you can drop, casually, that you are raising your vibration. Don't deny.
Except you aren't. If it were that easy, There would be lots of people with a vibrational frequency on or above the level of unconditional love (540/1000 on the map of vibration)... instead of the ten (worldwide), at the time of this article.