You: The Happiest person or the happiest looking person?

Please email me if you find a typo or something unclear. Thank you. Sophie

You won’t be surprised that 70% of you will choose ‘happiest looking’, because what people think, what they say about you is more important to you than how you feel. And that makes you an eight billion… unfortunately.

What do Sophie’s 1000 do that you probably don’t

The only real difference between you and the 1000 is your relationship to what you do. The 1000 cause what they do. Nearly 100% of the time.


You see, it is difficult to teach how to cause… because the distinction is missing.

It can only be seen from what it isn’t. What isn’t causing. In some way, what isn’t choosing… although the overlap is only 30%.

Choosing is easier to demonstrate…

The Chocolate or Vanilla exercise from the Landmark Forum does a decent job at it.

But causing? Can you see from the outside if someone is causing what they do or they do it because they have to, or do it because want to do it, or do it because they are bored…

Every time you can say: I am doing this because… you are assigning power, assigning cause to something other than yourself.

I just realized I never CAUSE eating when I eat… That is one area where I am not causing…

Let me explain: I watched this Italian series, part of Walter Presents, where the police inspector could see and hear the dead and the last thought they thought or said. And they didn’t shut up until he solved the murder.

I can relate.

As a true empath I feel something 24/7, less early in the morning when people are sleeping. And I have to muscletest if the feeling is mine, lest I act on the feeling as if it were mine…

And the feelings I feel are only the unpleasant ones… I think. And the unpleasant things are hard to be with, so I unconsciously do react… and that is how I eat everything, except my breakfast.

I get up around 4 am, and have breakfast around 6:30, so right around now. When I feel hungry I muscletest if I am really hungry. But I don’t eat because I am hungry. I eat because I eat… I eat because that is what there is to do. In the morning I cause eating. It is not the clock, not hunger, not an intolerable feeling that causes it… like later in the day. Later in the day when I don’t cause any of my eating…

Although I decided last night to cause not-to-eat when I am miserably tormented by someone else’s emotions. Including emotions of the actors in movies… ugh.

What will I do instead? I don’t know yet. I’ll, maybe, just sit with it, knowing it doesn’t belong to me, and allow it to ravage me… (Note: I tried it. At first try I managed to hold off for two hours… and then I lost it… But I can see that I can get good at this… with practice.)

This will be one area where I will bring causing to my behavior… Consciously.

You see, with your own emotions: when you allow them to be, they allow you to be. But what about emotions that don’t belong to you?

OK, you say, causing my relationship to what I do. Why is it so important?

Really good question, let’s see if I can answer it for you.

You see, there is a life-experience and there is a life-experience.

If you are like a beach-ball on the big ocean, if you have no inner motor, no rudder, no causing, then when the weather is nice, you feel good. When you are blown into some bay with beautiful colorful houses somewhere on the shores of Italy, you love it. But all you can do is all you can do without motor, without rudder, without causing, all you can do is praying. Praying for the wind to be kind to you. The currents to go in the direction where you want to go.

You can also be like a volley ball, being caused by other people…

But if you are causing yourself, then you are causing your life.

True, causing doesn’t trump everything. Wars can break out. The price of things can go up. Your spouse can get frisky with someone else.

But outside of those, and even with those things happening…

you can cause yourself, and like a cat, you land on your feet.

You know that if it is to be it is up to you… and you do it cheerfully, because what is there to do is what is there to do.

Instead of bemoaning your fate, blame the wind, blame the current, hate the prices, beat up the husband, cry about the war, you choose who to be… your attitude, your behavior, and do what there is to do so you can be OK. Because you are accountable to your life, it is yours to manage, to drive, to lead.

When you are someone who causes, you avoid mind altering substances, because you won’t blunt the most important asset you have: yourself.

You organize your life so you can remain sharp. Conscious. In good spirits.

You expand because you know that only when you are expanding you experience yourself alive and winning. Winning what? Winning over entropy, winning over the human condition, winning over your ‘evil’ inclinations.

And when occasionally you don’t win, you dust yourself off, and go for it again.

When you find a new wrinkle of how you are not all you can be…

  • if and when you are a beach ball, you deflate. You want to disappear. You don’t want to hear it. Or you ask someone to rescue you.
  • But when you are causing yourself, then in spite of finding it painful (it is!) you also find it an opportunity to look, to examine, and to conquer over it. Moreover, you are even actively looking for these ‘wrinkles’.

Yesterday I found a wrinkle. A false belief that has rendered me a puppet on a string, ever since I was three.

I had never seen it for what it is. And oh horror, mine is a version of my least performing students’ false belief.

When I was three I got lost in a street affair. A man approached me and offered his hand. I KNEW he was there to take me home. But instead he took me to a barn, threw me into the hay, and you can finish the sentence.

My decision about the incident was that I was stupid. That only smart people deserve to live. My parents were smart. My brother was smart. I needed to be smart too.

So from there on I acted the smart… Smart people don’t have to look before they leap. Only not so smart people have to do that. (I didn’t look before I leapt in that incident. I didn’t doubt, didn’t question, didn’t find out what the dude wanted. Because I already I KNEW without looking!)

Since that time I have lived my life, forcefully not looking before I would leap…

I considered even just looking an admission that I am not very smart.

Not much can be successfully achieved with this attitude. So this has been a wholly limiting belief: that smart people don’t have to look before they leap.

For me this belief was causing me, I wasn’t causing myself.

This has been one of the main leaks of my power.

OK, I see it. But so far I haven’t done anything more than have seen the monster that has been running my life. It won’t change the belief!!!

Can I do away with it? Muscletest says yes. But I promise it will be a daily struggle until it becomes natural, the natural choice.

I will have to cause choosing my behavior when it is time to leap.

Muscletest says that there are other areas where I am not causing… But victory in each raises the degree to which I choose my behavior.

This takes me to another way the 1000 are different.

They don’t entertain the belief that it should be easy, that it should be pleasant, that it should be fast.

Instead they say: It will take as long as it takes.

Just like the Arizona Rainman: he dances for rain until the rain comes.

A 1000 works, fights, negotiates for what they want until it happens. Not like the rest of the world, who creates a wish, a visionboard, a plan, and then quits when it is not happening fast enough.

People misunderstand Wallace D. Wattles. He says what I say…

…while what people understand is clear from what they do: they plan and they wait for the Formless to fill their order… Or they think Life is like a takeout restaurant, like Pam Ragland teaches. You place your order and then you wait. Lol… I would really laugh if it were at least a little funny.

Many of the people who come to my site think exactly like that.

They buy some activator, or some program, and they don’t do what would make them give what they paid for… No. By buying they placed their order in this takeout restaurant and they fully expect to get what they ordered. Preferably fast.

The nature of reality is such that you get what you work for, what you fight for, what you negotiate for.

Deserving is a stupid word… if it says that just because of some reason you now should get what you want. As if the Universe were this mother putting food on your plate.

The Universe isn’t like a mother. And you DESERVE nothing. Not even your life.

Religion has it wrong. There is not some loving god giving you what you ask for. Religion is just another version of Pam Ragland’s takeout kitchen. Wholly turning people to sheep.

Every single spiritual asset I acquired happened through waging WAR. I fought for it. I negotiated with Ego and with people. And I worked towards it. I have been relentless.

Are you relentless about anything?

Yeah, maybe about complaining. When you complain your worldview (belief) is that if you hate something, if you resist something, if you complain about something then someone, maybe god, will fix it for you. How stupid!

If you want something then plan for it and then work for it, fight for it, negotiate for it.

And when you don’t want something, like a false belief, like disabling ignorance, then chip away at it, relentlessly, by building what you want.

Build the healthy belief to compete with the false belief, build the knowledge to compete with disabling ignorance, and at some point you’ll start to win. And later the new, the healthy will become natural and the only choice.

Most of you say: let me think about it… whatever the it is. That leads to disabling ignorance… because what you call thinking is really rearranging the furniture in the mind.

The only way to beat that disabling ignorance is to look and see in reality. And when you see it you’ll know it.

At this point when you say: let me look, you’ll actually see nothing. If you do, you are still looking in the mind. So if you see nothing that is a good sign: you are looking in reality.

You probably have nothing in reality to look at, because you haven’t built anything, any knowledge in reality. Everything you ‘know’ is not based on your personal experience… so don’t expect to see anything in the beginning. Nothing there.

But eventually, if you are persistent about looking, you’ll start to see things, especially if you do the things I suggest… so you start building a life-raft in reality…

One of my students had a project to learn to ride a unicycle. For some reason she’s abandoned it. But her experience learning to balance without having a handlebar to hold onto can be the beginnings of a life-raft…

As she is learning to look instead of ‘think’ that experience is the raft she can attach new things she sees, new things she experiences.

And before she knows it, it will be easier to look instead of ‘think’, and she will be on her way to have a healthy and effective way to move around in the world.

At this point she is trying to fix that she judges. That she sees things as wrong.

But is she really seeing?

Yeah, in a way… in her mind. Things in the mind CANNOT change, do not change… so if you want anything to change, you need to look outside of the mind, outside, in reality, where the only constant is change.

Your self lives in the mind… but your Self, your higher self lives outside, it lives in reality.

The little self hates the big Self, because in the mind you cannot love, cannot even tolerate anything different, especially what is higher than you.

So as long as you live in the mind, ‘thinking’, you’ll hate yourself, and you’ll hate your life.

In the upcoming Integrity Live workshop we’ll pinpoint the main, the core issue that you have, that if you dealt with it you would have a chance for loving yourself.

And to the degree that we can do it in a short workshop, we’ll see how to go about dealing with it.

Ultimately the method is what I am saying in this article: build a new behavior, based on how reality really is, while you chip away at the disabling belief.

The new behavior should be clear once you see what the disabling belief makes you do. The opposite…

One of the clues you have…

If you look, if you manage to Observe yourself from the outside, what it is that you persistently say ‘I cannot’. It is the visible part of your disabling belief.

And the action is to do what you say you can’t.

Energetic support

For energetic support you can get one of the activators. Support I said, not what will do the job. You do the job there is to do with the support of the energy.

If you want something or someone to do the job for you, you haven’t come to the right place. I don’t offer it, never have. If that is what you heard I promised, you heard it wrong.

So if you want the energies to do the work for you, change your mind, or leave. I have nothing for you.

So what activators could support you?

Healthy beliefs… This is a great overall activator, but unfortunately it only works if you can connect to Source.

And, of course, the Avatar State Audios… that play in the background
Seeing the big picture
Get into action

And, of course, the Integrity Live workshop… so you know what to work on!

Integrity Live
My bet is that your biggest complaint is money or fulfillment.

If you don’t want to come to a group call, you can try to book a private session… but before I’ll grant one, I need to see your Starting Point Measurements. You need to be available for a call when I am available, between 9 am and 4 pm my time. (New York).

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Author: Sophie Benshitta Maven

True empath, award winning architect, magazine publisher, transformational and spiritual coach and teacher, self declared Avatar

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