In this article I teach you something about yourself that you probably didn't notice, haven't known, a way you unwittingly and unintentionally grow Evil and the Dark Side, that you so valiantly fight in other ways...
You can't catch what you don't see. Now you will. Now you can catch it.
I have told this story many times, but I will tell you again. Good stories can be told many times.
Some 2,000 years ago lived a famous rabbi in the Land of Israel, Akiva Ben Joseph, aka Rabbi Akiva 1. He was 40 years old when he married a woman who saw in him more than he saw in himself. She encouraged him to spend all his time studying the Law of the Lord, because in that age that was the highest one could aspire for.
He left to study and he was good. He came back after ten years. She encouraged him to go for another ten years. He became a very famous rabbi, probably the most famous of all.
Akiva taught thousands of students: on one occasion, twenty-four thousand students of his died in a plague. His five main, last remaining students were Judah bar Ilai, Rabbi Meir, Rabbi Eleazar ben Shammua, Jose ben Halafta and Shimon bar Yochai (the author of The Zohar, the book of Splendour).
When all those students spare the few died, he did a lot of soul-searching. He felt that he missed something that all those students died.
What he found is simple: he had based his teaching on knowing the word of God but missed teaching the spirit of God: Love your neighbor as yourself. His students were very knowledgeable, they were charitable, they did good. But with their fellow students they were competitive.
They had a scarcity mindset: there is only so much success to go around. The idea of a limited pie of wealth, success, wellness, prosperity, fame, etc. If you get more, someone has to get less.
The thinking goes like this: if they succeed then I will be less successful.
In the area of money it would be: if I give them I will have less. If the make more, there is less left for me.
In Kabbalistic terms this is called "desire for the self alone" and it flies in the face of the unlimited nature of the Universe, and it's an insult to the Creator.
So how does that same exact thing look in today's day and age?
We live in a do-good society. People pride themselves in helping the less fortunate, the sick, the lazy, the dumb, and the entitled.
They give of their time, their used stuff (if there is a tax write-off, especially), maybe even money. They create projects for them. They collect stuff for them. They create websites for do-gooders... It's the in-thing.
They set themselves up to give "down." Maybe, occasionally, they give up, like drive a famous guru, or something like that. On condition, of course, that they get close to greatness... like in case of a guru.
If you look deeper, it is all about the giver, how they look, how they feel about themselves. They don't really care... they only care about themselves.
Giving horizontally? To give to people that if you helped them, the other could achieve real greatness? God forbid.
Whether you know it or not, you are harboring a scarcity mentality. You are afraid to let another grow beyond you.
I heard a behavior-defining saying from a famous Hungarian standup comic when I was around 30: life is like being a fence post: If you stand out they will hammer you into the ground to be level with all the others.
I just understood it completely today.
I looked at the report from Amazon on who bought the kindle book in answer to my request to support me, for 99 cents.
A total of 13 copies sold.
Two copies sold to two of my students: both are the most extraordinarily committed people anyone ever wanted to teach.
11 copies sold to people who don't know me other than from visiting my site.
None of my friends, none of my other students, none of my fellow-students (I am a student too, lol) bought it to support me.
When I went to visit their bodies empathically to get clues, I found a mix of resentment and envy.
Exactly the same feelings and attitude that allowed Rabbi Akiva's students to perish in the plague.
Any feeling or thought of competing, comparison, envy, the desire to tear someone down, lowers your vibration.
Desire for the self alone is what we call evil. The Dark Side is exclusively made up of that, desire for the self alone. Wanting what belongs to another or denying another the emotional support in order to keep them small, down and out, cut them to size.
I don't care whether you buy my book or not. Ultimately it is just a collection of articles you can read on this very blog. Even the pictures are the same. I get 35 cents before taxes, so even if I sold one to every reader of this blog I would not pay one month's worth of rent from all the money I get.
But I do care whether the people who read my blog, learn from me, or call us friends, are only there to keep me down, to build the Dark Side, to work against the Light.
I care about that.
Please start watching your feelings, watching your attitudes, and start catching yourself killing life, and supporting death.
When you get disgusted with yourself enough, maybe you'll be ready to join the light.
PS: I have to admit, I've taken it personally that the amount of support didn't match the amount of value I think I have been giving.
But, of course,
- value is only in the eye of the recipient
- perception of value is proportionate to the amount of effort one was ask to obtain something: here: none... therefore no value
- by making my articles available for no cost I am also adding to the Dark Side because I encourage the moochers and the looters, possibly yourself to continue mooching and looting
- the fact that I write these articles to get clear and not for you isn't an excuse. It's time to go back to the drawing board and force YOU to put out if you want my stuff... hm. What do you think?
PPS: you can still get my book on amazon. if you don't have a kindle, send me your receipt and I'll send you a pdf. here is the link to amazon: my amazon book for 99 cents: The Grand Experiment. I will be grateful and you'll be able to feel better about yourself.
The real accomplishment is to catch yourself... you can't catch what you don't see.