It makes me look like an old lady, but that doesn’t make me an old lady… yet it took me quite a while to warm up to the idea of having no wheels of my own.
I pay her $30 cash, and I didn’t have any cash yesterday. So I paid with my debit card and asked for $40 cash back. I normally use the self-checkout line, faster for me.
I was putting away my groceries and I noticed that people were waiting, so I hurried up, and got out of the way. 20 minutes later I noticed that I didn’t take my $40, so I went back to ask if the employee overseeing the four self-service checkout machines held the money for me.
No money; the woman on that post has an attitude that she is a scarecrow, while she chats with another employee or talks on the phone, so I didn’t think so, but it was worth a try.
Security swung into action, they counted the money, and replayed the security video and called me this morning to tell me that another customer took the money, and I should file with the police: it is some kind of crime, I don’t recall what size, but more than misdemeanor.
I said I wasn’t going to file: I pick my battles, and this one is not one of them.
Pick your battles.
Battles can be for something, and battles can be against something or someone.
You only have energy for so many battles. You can’t win them all, and it’s not worth winning them all.
Actually, it is not really worth going for a battle that you can win: it puts you on a treadmill where you need to win some battles to feel good about yourself.
But a battle you can win like that, is puny, and is not worth your energies.
I am not talking about business projects, thought many of those are pure distractions.
Most people on the internet have short term and puny battles, and their lives are about winning the battles so they can survive. Misery and excitement… addictive, slavery, not a life I would recommend to someone who is up to something bigger than that.
When you are winning is all about you, it is a Dark Side winning.
When your projects are all about you or yours: it is a Dark Side battle. Keeps you small, keeps you about yourself.
Your projects, i.e. your battles need to be for something bigger than you, bigger than your life. They need to have no end in sight, they need to plant trees under the shade of you’ll never sit.
“A society grows great when old men plant trees whose shade they know they shall never sit in.”
“The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. ” Nelson Henderson
But society aside, when you live your life as if all were about you, when all your projects, all your battles are about you, it is like driving with your eyes on the hood of the car you are driving… you bump into everything, you drive too slowly, and you drive blindly.
Being distracted by every injustice, every slight, every hurt, every slur, or alternatively being distracted by every shiny object gives you a tiny life, and lots of misery.
Of course, until you grain some ground over your own Shadow Side, your own Dark Side, you won’t be able to see clearly what is your personal battle… this is one of the benefits of doing the work I teach and coach… having a consistent, seamless life, where you know who you are and you know what you are about.
It takes work to get there, but it is soooo worth it! Some people call this soul’s purpose, or life’s purpose, by the way.