Reality? collective hunch at best!

lily-tomlin-actress-quote-reality-is-nothing-but-a-collective-hunchMy article Energies Part 4: Designer Energies has been read by many people, and everyone I have spoken with, has, so far, misunderstood it. It matches not reality, but what they think of as reality

Why? Because the article touches on the most fundamental worldview through which you perceive everything: Through your personal reality.

You can’t see it, you can’t verbalize it, you don’t believe when someone calls it your worldview: it is reality for you, and that’s that.

No matter who it is, what they do for a living, what level of education, what level of vibration they are at: we all have a personal reality. Each vastly different from another’s…

In a conversation I just had with a client who is of Hungarian descent but was born in this country (the USA) I shared that Hungarian parents don’t talk to their children in the high pitch voice and baby words as Amarican parents do. They talk lovingly, but normally.

Hungarian children… Continue reading “Reality? collective hunch at best!”

Resistance to new: fear. Fear of the unknown. How to win?

fearPart of being a good coach is to experience the scary stuff the client is experiencing or will experience on their journey… so I can have compassion, and maybe some tools to ease their bad experience and help them through some obstacle.

I am in the middle of exactly that… and I am quaking in my boots…

I was never a fan of new things… I am not an excitement junkie… not me… sorry. And now that I am old, it is even less tempting… and yet, it takes me less deliberation nowadays than it used to, to ‘jump’.

Jumping off the diving board is a very good analogy… but even getting into the pool or the lake. You don’t know if you can survive.

In fact, all fear is fear of death… The interesting thing about me: death itself doesn’t scare me as much as the path to it, the pain, the horror, the experience.

OK… even just writing those few words… Continue reading “Resistance to new: fear. Fear of the unknown. How to win?”

On coaching: what it is, what it isn’t… It’s a bridge

walk-the-bridge-with-me coachingGood coaching is a bridge… Bad coaching is not.

We all have some area where we don’t already have a bridge, a path, to where we want to be

What bridge? What is a bridge? Between an idea and its fulfillment, materialization. Between a problem and its solution.

Most bridges are connectors between words and actions. Or future words and the process that will make it work. Or teaching and what we actually make of it.

Or maybe our words and the feelings we want to feel, mostly about ourselves…

Words and feelings. Words and doing. Doing and something built in reality. Different ‘modalities’. Continue reading “On coaching: what it is, what it isn’t… It’s a bridge”

Do you have enough? Energy, knowledge, attention, love?

I wish you enoughHow do you set the price of your product or program? Or help. Or work. That was the question yesterday in my coaching program.

I know you are probably not a product creator, or a coach. But yet you do have a product or a program… if you work for a salary, if you have friends, a spouse, children.

No matter where you are in life, no matter what you do, money comes to you from other people… or love… or support.

The question here is: what are they paying for? What are they reciprocating?

Depending on your about-me score, you’ll have a different answer… Continue reading “Do you have enough? Energy, knowledge, attention, love?”

Big audacious actions or tiny steps?

tiny steps methodBack in the fall of 1987 I was in a camp in mountainous Kingston NY. I was participating in a highly physical course, called the 6-day course, challenging both your body and your fear and what you should do with it. It also added the method of tiny steps that is the secret I want to share in this article.

One of the challenges was to cross a valley on a cable stretched, just with your arm’s strength… (Of course I don’t know what it is called, so the pictures are all about zip-lines… oops… what are they called, do you know?)

The first half of the climb was easy… your weight created a slope in the cable… the second part was wicked… you had to, hand over hand, pull your weight over.

It was a lot like mountain climbing: you put one foot in front of the other, and you don’t quit. Small feats take you there. Continue reading “Big audacious actions or tiny steps?”

I am not ready! What if I choose the wrong path?

what if monsterWhat if? Let’s look at it, shall we?

You see, the ‘mind’ is only concerned with future… while it squarely looks at the past. Yeah, the mind looks in the direction of the future, but it looks at the rear view mirror…

And it makes its decisions from the past, past failures, past track record, past mistakes, past pains and punishments.

Moreover, the mind is only interested in the bad stuff… it wants to protect you from it.

I have a track record of 70% good decisions, and I can see what the mind is doing: it looks straight at the 30%… not at the good decisions. Continue reading “I am not ready! What if I choose the wrong path?”

How and what can move you out of not moving?

inertia renders you not moving aka stuckIsaac Newton was very famous… he invented the concept of gravity, he created laws of movement, and a lot of other things we consider laws… blah blah blah.

Newton formulated the laws of motion and universal gravitation that formed the dominant scientific viewpoint until it was superseded by the theory of relativity.

The most important laws he ‘formulated’ that have a day to day effect to understand ourselves are the laws of motion.

His first ‘law’ of motion can be expressed in many different ways, examples:

  • A stationary object with no outside force will not move.
  • With no outside forces, a moving object will not stop.
  • An object at rest stays at rest.

Continue reading “How and what can move you out of not moving?”