How to become someone who can make good decisions that really serve you?

Is it worth it? Is it worth the bother, the effort, the work? Will it get me finally what I want?

One of the reasons people don't like to try new things is because they cannot judge whether they can do it or not. Whether it will be easy or not. Whether it will be pleasant and enjoyable or not.

How come? Why is it so difficult? Life is complex, and most of us have no tolerance for complexity. Complexity, ambivalence, ambiguity are normal, but the capacity to hold them becomes available to you in only at a certain brain development age... If you got stuck in young child brain development, that is most people, you have never developed the capacity.

Can you develop this capacity now? Of course you can. What is preventing you from doing it? Your low TLB number... you are a Twitchy Little Bastard... and you can't deal with complexity, confusion, or looking long enough to actually see something.

Some of my students, when they learned about my habit of looking long and more than just once... as a way to deal with my dyslexia, have started to practice the same... and their ability to hold controversy and ambivalence has increased... because of that practice. But if you fancy yourself smart, quick, etc. Looking long and hard is going to be difficult, because your precious "I" will tell you that only stupid people look long and hard.

Actually the opposite is true: your precious "I" is deceiving you and keeping you... eh... stupid. In the stupid as the stupid does sense. Continue reading "How to become someone who can make good decisions that really serve you?"

Unflinchingly… Authenticity is a level of integrity. A high level of integrity.

lying-is-comfortableI just finished a webinar... One of my students wrote an email to me wondering why I don't lie to me before and doing a webinar, saying it is going to be easy, it is going to be piece of cake.

It took quite a bit for me to learn that trying to outwardly act like a Buddha won’t make me a Buddha.

The above line (The vulnerability that honesty requires isn't something everybody can handle. Lying allows people to be comfortable) is from one of my students.

Really smart guy, isn't he?

And I bet you can see that the next step he would take after making this really smart statement is to start... start what?

You see, most of what sounds smart is not that smart. Most of what sounds smart is a smoke screen, to hide something.
Continue reading "Unflinchingly… Authenticity is a level of integrity. A high level of integrity."

A life worth living: What does poetry have to do with it?

love-truth-goodnessThe world is mundane. Ordinary. At least through ordinary eyes. It is just the way it is.

Some people see beauty, some people see truth, some people see goodness, but for the most part you see reasons to justify why you only trudge through life, never really seeing any poetry, any romance, anything really uplifting.

The Beyond, The Divine, The "Spirit" gets through to you through one of those, truth, beauty, goodness, and how you know it got to you because something echoes in your Soul.

You cry, you laugh, you shut up... words don't come close to express it.

When I work with people on their life's purpose, on the meaning of their lives, especially when I do it in a private call, I need to work a lot.

When I speak your purpose, as I see it, I hear you being hooked, being moved. Then you get off the call, and turn it into mundane... money, sex, or such other stuff, that makes life and you stuck in the mud. Continue reading "A life worth living: What does poetry have to do with it?"

How Does The Universe Get To You? Are You A Truth, A Beauty, Or A Goodness Person?

the triangle is the truth, the circle is the beauty, the heart is the goodness

I've been weeping for an hour or so. It is the tears of the soul.

The trigger: thinking of Billy Elliot, well known to many: where the spirit had a chance to fully express itself through a human: a rare phenomenon: we seem to have a hard time hearing the gently nudging of the spirit. By spirit I really mean the soul: I use the words interchangeably. In Hebrew: ruah, neshama, nefesh: they are different states of the same soul: expressing where the soul is with regards to its correction, with regards to becoming like God. 1

The other movie is "Together," a 2002 Chinese movie about a young violinist, whose father, tirelessly grooms him and pushes him to be a top performer. We, together with the boy, find out that his father is not his father. The man who brought him up since he was a few days old found him at a train station with a violin next to him. He searched for the mother in vain, and he took it on himself to bring up the boy the way the mother seemed to have asked him: to become a violinist. 2
Continue reading "How Does The Universe Get To You? Are You A Truth, A Beauty, Or A Goodness Person?"

Are you disappointed with yourself for not being higher minded, and achieving more in life?

be an empty spotFor years I've seen that humans, humanity, are stuck in a place where happiness is impossible, accomplishment is not predictable, and health is touch and go.

I've had big hopes, selfish hopes, that I will be the one to unstuck you.

Lots of other people have this hope... and the hopes remain hopes, because you have a vested interest to keep what keeps you stuck in place? If we knew what keeps you stuck, maybe we could unstuck you.

This article is an attempt to identify that one thing. The linchpin issue.
Continue reading "Are you disappointed with yourself for not being higher minded, and achieving more in life?"

The hidden spiritual capacity that is underneath all the others… I think.

some people never learnIt's been coming up with more and more frequency:

We don't know what it looks like to be good, to be kind, to be independent, to be happy, etc.

I wrote recently about my quest to become a kind person.

I am 70 years old. Why now? why so late in life?

When I look back at my childhood, when I look at my brothers, their wives, I see no kindness. EVER.

I am now able to be kind except right now, today... I am irritated, and out of balance... I don't want to share the "story", but please know that there are innate capacities and learned capacities. I will never be as patient as a saint... especially when I am out of balance... Kindness and patience are intimately connected.

Spiritual virtues, like kindness, goodness, love, forgiveness... etc. you only learn when you see it in many situations. We could be simplistic and call it learning by osmosis. Continue reading "The hidden spiritual capacity that is underneath all the others… I think."

Who and what is making your decisions, your attitude, your behavior?

From time to time a student or client confides in me that they resent being told what to do.

I find that really funny, especially when they paid me well for telling them what to do.

But such is human nature... or is that human nature?

This question is what this article is about. How do you know it is you and not some addon making your decisions for you? Continue reading "Who and what is making your decisions, your attitude, your behavior?"

The ability to be in awe… how will it matter for your life?

aweSometimes it is the people no one can imagine anything of who do the things no one can imagine~Alan Turing

I watched yet another movie about Alan Turing and how his machine won the war against Nazi Germany.

I would not be around without him. And you would live a totally different life... The book (and the Amazon series) The Man in the High Castle approximates...

I am in awe. With what he did, with who he was, with genius winning, with goodness winning.

Continue reading "The ability to be in awe… how will it matter for your life?"

Feeling deeply and effortless abundance… what is the connection?

are you interested or are you committed?It's a normal day to me: I went deep inside the energy body of a person in Singapore and got in touch with her life, her urges, how she thinks, and what pains she has. I pulled her energetic attachments.

I was feeling her grief, and inner storm for an hour or two, while she was digesting the information.

She has calmed down, maybe because it is really late at night in Singapore.

And yet I am still with her emotions...

I am taken deep into the book I just finished reading, a novel about a couple who lost their 2-year old son.
Continue reading "Feeling deeply and effortless abundance… what is the connection?"

All marketers are liars. The likely story… that likely happened but not really

all-marketers-are-liars-by-seth-godinI have been muscle testing, diligently, if the stories that sell products, courses, software, are facts or made-up likely stories.

A likely story is a lie.

We, marketers, are taught: facts tell, but stories sell.

And so every sales letter is one story of another.

I used to be a liar, because I didn't think life was interesting enough, so I embellished it. I was caught, and it didn't matter. I just kept making up interesting stories, mostly sob stories about myself.

I was selling myself... and because I didn't think I had anything to offer, I lied.
Continue reading "All marketers are liars. The likely story… that likely happened but not really"