I had a weird experience a few minutes ago.
I was working on something for a student of mine and I felt hate. Or maybe disgust.
Then I looked at people I know. I have felt that same feeling towards a lot of people. Like my favorite brother: but I felt that same feeling AND yet I love my favorite brother. WTF, right?
Then I tried it on with my mother, who died this month 24 years ago.
I said: I love my mother and I hate the behavior… and then cried. Really cried. It’s been bottled up for decades, Continue reading “Love, Hate… what is going on? Can you see below the hood?”
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Roller coasters are fun, exciting, and you can scream all you want… But when your whole life is a roller coaster, 24/7, that is not fun. That is exhausting.
I used to feel like my life was a roller coaster. Like people, emotions (my reactions to people, events, tasks) were jerking me left and jerking me right.
I hated the experience. I like smooth. I like to feel in control of my life and my inner state.
But nothing I knew could do that for me, smooth out my ride… nothing. … and believe me, I tried.
I took courses. I learned to use energies. I exercised. Nothing seemed to eliminate the roller coaster… until… until a few months ago. The ride was getting smoother… but life was still jerking me.