I had a weird experience a few minutes ago.
I was working on something for a student of mine and I felt hate. Or maybe disgust.
Then I looked at people I know. I have felt that same feeling towards a lot of people. Like my favorite brother: but I felt that same feeling AND yet I love my favorite brother. WTF, right?
Then I tried it on with my mother, who died this month 24 years ago.
I said: I love my mother and I hate the behavior… and then cried. Really cried. It’s been bottled up for decades, Continue reading “Love, Hate… what is going on? Can you see below the hood?”
Roller coasters are fun, exciting, and you can scream all you want… But when your whole life is a roller coaster, 24/7, that is not fun. That is exhausting.
I used to feel like my life was a roller coaster. Like people, emotions (my reactions to people, events, tasks) were jerking me left and jerking me right.
I hated the experience. I like smooth. I like to feel in control of my life and my inner state.
But nothing I knew could do that for me, smooth out my ride… nothing. … and believe me, I tried.
I took courses. I learned to use energies. I exercised. Nothing seemed to eliminate the roller coaster… until… until a few months ago. The ride was getting smoother… but life was still jerking me.