Self-love, self-hate… let’s dig deep on these, shall we?

self-hateIntegrity is an inside job. It is between you and yourself.

Everyone has two selves, one that is perfect, and the other that is flawed.

The perfect one is generous, loving, unconditionally. It is compassionate.

The flawed one KNOWS, i.e. assumes that it is judged, looked down upon, and is full of hatred, anger, fear, anxiety, rebellion, and expects to be loved and accepted the way it is… and even though is loved, and accepted… it can only feel its own emotions.

This is so with every emotion. You can’t feel the love that is coming towards you. You can only feel the love that you feel for the other, Your love. Your anger. Your hate.

So no matter how much the perfect self loves the flawed self, the flawed self will feel judged… hated, despised, etc.

I have been observing my clients and my students, and there is one common characteristic that only varies in intensity: and that is self-hate… and stinginess towards self… as in punishing the self for not being perfect. Continue reading “Self-love, self-hate… let’s dig deep on these, shall we?”

Going from hate and disgust to feeling good about yourself. From hate to love

from hate to loveOne of the few things I need to be aware and manage diligently is to not slip into hate and disgust about things or people. And when I do slip, to go from hate to love with them.

One of my ‘favorite’ ways to slip into hate and disgust has been to gossip about things or people… whom otherwise I love and cherish, but something about them irks me.

The solution is to make room for the imperfection, the part that irks me, and then I can love them, warts and all.

The secret is to rant first and accept second.

  • What most people do is suppress. It is wrong to hate your teacher, for example. Or your wife.
  • Or alternatively, they get stuck in hate. They don’t proceed to acceptance.

Continue reading “Going from hate and disgust to feeling good about yourself. From hate to love”

Do you spend time with yourself? Or are you trying to be busy all the time? What does that say about you?

Your soul, your spirit, knows right from wrong

If it only had an opportunity to talk to you, to be heard, you’d probably consider stopping doing the wrongs that you do, if only to have peace inside, to have less tension, to have more joy.

The two selves we all have are twins separated at birth… one grows according to DNA, the other according to outside influences… nature vs. nurture.

The further “nurture” makes the one twin (self) go, the worse the relationship becomes, the more, whenever they get to see each other, the one hates the other. Which one is doing the hating, you ask? Continue reading “Do you spend time with yourself? Or are you trying to be busy all the time? What does that say about you?”